"I definitely agree. The very first book I ever completed happened when my son was almost one and I would lie beside him for two naps a day plus bedtime (about an hour and a half of my day). I wrote so much of my book before I even set down to the…"
"It's tough converting the pitch into different lengths: 3 paragraphs for queries, <140 characters for Twitter, 5-6 lines for Pitch Slam, 200 words for other contests.
Each set of criteria means a whole rewrite. And don't even…"
"I'm not sure the timeframe is necessary in the pitch at all. Maybe in a full query, but not for this 5-6 line entry. As one of my writer friends says when it comes to pitching "Sell the sizzle, not the steak!"
::: cringes as he offers…"
"This feedback is intended to be helpful! ;) The few issues that made me pause had to do with timing. They may be clear in the novel, but their juxtaposition in the confines of a short pitch make them seem at odds with one another.
The MC was missing…"
"Crystal Hidalgo - YA Thriller - UNWILLING
Three years have passed since Emma was kidnapped. No one knows what happened to her or how she ended up back at home, safe and sound. The four month gap in her memory has left her living in fear. In an…"
"She has a secret she doesn’t know she’s keeping; he has a secret he never meant to tell.
Three years have passed since Emma was kidnapped in Mexico. No one can explain how she ended up safely at home months after she went missing, least…"
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I'm not sure the timeframe is necessary in the pitch at all. Maybe in a full query, but not for this 5-6 line entry. As one of my writer friends says when it comes to pitching "Sell the sizzle, not the steak!"
::: cringes as he offers advice while his own wordy pitch glares at him from the Pitch Slam thread ::: ;)
This feedback is intended to be helpful! ;) The few issues that made me pause had to do with timing. They may be clear in the novel, but their juxtaposition in the confines of a short pitch make them seem at odds with one another.
The MC was missing for 3 years, but only has a 4 month gap in her memory? And I was confused about her age--if this is YA--since she is now in her senior year. Did she disappear as a freshman? If so, wouldn't she still be one since she didn't click through the grades like everyone else? Or, if she disappeared as a senior, then isn't she around 21 by now?
Once again, these things may be clear in the book, but refining the details of the time references in the pitch (or removing them altogether?) will remove the obstacle that made me go "Huh?" If it tripped up little ol' me, it may very well do the same to an agent.
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