"Great idea. Suggest you follow with what's going on in the psych unit now. Going back to third grade is a bit jarring. I need some reason to like and want to read on about your protagonist. What is IDK? I don't know? Whatever, it stopped…"
Stephanie gave a pretty thorough review so I don't have too much more to add. My biggest concern is with the sub-plot details here. I think it's fine that we know both kids are dealing with issues at home, but we get a lot of…"
"Hi, Carolyn. I like the idead of your MC being forced into this drama club so that she can put it on her college app. I think you could clarify what her plan is in this opening scene. Is she going to try to score a small role? Does she want the…"
I'll go through and put my comments in caps so you can find them.
SABAH was thrown out of Mlena as a child.WHY? She’s spent her entire life with BERG WHO IS BERG?andthe MISTRESS, the woman who raised them and never…"
"I'm just going to copy the whole thing here and "pick" at it. Yeah, right:)?
"At Ash City High School, on the edge of Lake Superior, gorgeous bi-racialIS IT "BIRACIAL"? male Logan Spenser is the hottest prize…"
"I agree with Christine's assessments and am also confused about some other elements -- there seem to be a few steps missing in the explanation, such as how the "50 kisses" for a right answer develops and why Logan's dad should…"
I'll take a look and maybe you'll do the same for me for my 1-866...
I'm putting my comments in CAPS, but I'm not shouting, just trying to make them stand out for you.
Seventeen-year-old Quinn hasn’t slept in…"
"I'm not great at writing a synopsis so please take what I say with a grain of salt. Here's my comments. I hope something helps!
1st Paragraph- I love the first sentence, but I think the rest could be either woven in later or taken out…"
I don't think they have to be dark. Mine sure isn't. If I can find the info I just got on what's selling lately, I'll forward it, but it's not dystopian. (Agent Mary Kole says we are in a "trend valley" right now).
I'm about halfway through a revision o Snark and would be happy to exchange. I have two more weeks of teaching and dealing with students and then I will have time for the first time in a long time to actually get to this writing thing. I'm getting my first five pages critiqued at New England SCBWI conference today and a critique from an agent tomorrow, Hopefully I'll be energized to get this writing going -- and not demoralized. (Even so, I would still help if I can!)
Hi! Thanks! I did do them, though I'm not a graphic artist by any stretch. Whenever I find myself procrastinating on my writing, I try to do something in that universe, be it a blog post or a cover or even "casting" my characters on a stock photo site. It keeps me in the mind set even if it's not actual words on the page. I'm definitely going to try and get an agent. I'm not cut out for doing all the behind the scenes work for my own writing.
Thanks for all your help so far and yes, let's keep helping each other!